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Mr. Obama, meet Mr. Durocher
by Andew Barbano
Aug 30, 2008 | 679 views | 0 0 comments | 13 13 recommendations | email to a friend | print
“Win any way as long as you can get away with it. Nice guys finish last.” Thus quoth Lippy Leo, manager of the Giants the last time they won a World Series in 1954. Durocher also posted a winning record with the Chicago Cubs.

The current Cubs manager, Lippy Lou Piniella, is likewise not noted for diplomacy or shyness.

Since he is a long-time resident of The Windy City, I assume that Sen. Barack Obama has gone to few Cubs games. If not, he should make time in the next few weeks and observe the combative Piniella’s successful style.

In his victory lap last week at Mile High Stadium, Obama said, “What I will not do is suggest that the Senator (McCain) takes his positions for political purposes. Because one of the things that we have to change in our politics is the idea that people cannot disagree without challenging each other’s character and patriotism.”

Mr. Durocher: “How you play the game is for college ball. When you’re playing for money, winning is the only thing that matters.”

John McCain understands. Like Bush the Elder in 1988, he has nominated a younger lightweight for vice-president, largely to appeal to what can now be termed the Facebook demographic: people who vote based on how somebody looks.

It worked for Nevada Gov. Jim the Dim and Bush the First. Both Jim Gibbons and Dan Quayle became laughingstocks. With eyes wide shut, enough cosmetic voters embraced the yahoos to make them winners.

History may judge the Denver Demolitioncrat convention as an exercise in self-congratulatory self-destruction. Sen. Hoover McCain has broken Obama’s momentum by placing Miss Sled Dog on the ticket. (COLUMNUS INTERRUPTUS: Just got an e-mail from Gov. Sarah Palin noting that she’s commander-in-chief of the Alaska National Guard. Nice to know we are being protected from invasion by Eskimos, Canadians and Siberians.)

Dan Quayle’s penchant for thick-headed statements have been eclipsed only by Dubya. Daddy Bush banished Dunderdan to the hinterlands for the rest of the 1998 campaign, surrounding him with aides to keep the media away.

Ms. Palin is already showing that she is worthy of standing in Quayle’s very small sneakers: “I didn’t get into government to do the safe and easy things. A ship in harbor is safe, but that’s not why the ship is built.”

The Exxon Valdez destroyed a large part of Alaska, which will never recover. It happened because the wrong person was captain. (The neoconservative U.S. Supreme Court just added insult to injury, wiping out most of the damages won by residents and business in the permanently polluted Prince William Sound.)

Worse, a ship in harbor is not necessarily safe during a major storm or hurricane. In port, it risks being thrown against a pier or onto rocks, so many vessels are taken to sea to ride out the situation.

McPalin can win. Obama’s campaign squandered countless hours of worldwide TV time playing pattycake. Did no one criticize John McCain for changing religions in order to win votes in the South Carolina primary? Oh, yeah, I almost forgot: “What I will not do is suggest that the senator takes his positions for political purposes.”

I shudder to think of comparing Donkeyite wussie words with what the Repelephants will exude at this week’s hatefest in St. Paul, where the GOP adds insult to injury.

In addition to doing their thing in the state that produced Eugene McCarthy, Hubert Humphrey, Walter Mondale, Paul Wellstone, Harmon Killebrew (see below) and Al Franken, the GOP is starting on Labor Day. Sparks unions have gotten calls from irate Republicans who consider it absolutely low brow.

If it motivates union members in particular and voters in general, then it’s one of the few mistakes the McCainanites have made recently.

Scurrilous Rumor Dept.

Like Twins slugger Killebrew, Gov. Palin was purportedly born in Idaho. Since the latter-day version of the Smear Boat Veterans Forsooth is working the Web questioning Obama’s citizenship, I’m starting a purely invented and incredible, fabricated and fatuous, ridiculous and rascally rumor of my own: Sarah Palin is not a U.S. citizen. As I noted on my TV show last Friday, she has the same last name as Monty Python alumnus Michael Palin, a documented Limey. In their movie “Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life,” Palin’s signature song was the manifestly anti-abortion “Every Sperm is Sacred.” Gov. Palin shares both the last name and the political position. Her citizenship is thus questionable and she may be legally barred from holding national office.

Shove that up your swiftboat smokestack and puff it.

On The Air

My show will be in rerun tomorrow, 2 to 4 p.m., replaying my entertaining two hours with University Regent Howard Rosenberg, taped on the day the Nevada Supreme Court ruled him and a passel of other local officials ineligible to seek re-election this year due to our cockamamie term limits law.

Reruns, Part Deux

Sam Shad will re-air his interview with Sen. Joe Biden, D-Del., this Tuesday. Taped in February 2007, Biden agrees with McCain and Dubya’s position on immigration reform. Public outcry killed the proposal, Shad notes, adding that Biden’s remarks will raise serious questions. Shad is still trying to get the opposition to stop using copyrighted video from his interview with McCain wherein the Arizona senator supports the Yucca Mountain nuclear waste dump. Shad’s show airs at 12:30 p.m. on KRNV TV-4, with a rerun at 9:30 p.m. on Charter cable channel 3 in Washoe-Carson-Douglas. Check the Web edition of this column at Barbwire.US for the complete statewide schedule.

Speaking of

Charter Cable

Thanks to former Tribune reporter Dennis Myers, who posted a statement from U.S. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid on Myers’ Reno News & Review blog. The Nevada Democrat is now on record as willing to join potential city of Reno legal action to keep Charter cable from moving public, educational and governmental (PEG) access television to high-cost, low-audience digital cyber-Siberia.

More Majority Leadership

Assemblyman John Oceguera, D-Las Vegas, has made Bill Draft Request No. 278, which “revises provisions governing PEG access channels.”

Charter has not only backed off (until at least Thanksgiving) moving community TV channels in Washoe County, but also in Carson and Douglas. I urge ratepayers in the latter counties to show up at local government meetings this Thursday and ask for support of the consumer coalition. My organization, ReSurge.TV, stands ready to sue on behalf of ratepayers in communities like Sparks in which their governments have decided to do nothing. If you can afford it, please consider donating to the cause by mail at P.O. Box 10034, Reno NV 89510, or at ReSurge.TV.

Enjoy a safe, happy and non-laborious Labor Day weekend.

Be well. Raise hell.

Andrew Barbano is a 39-year Nevadan and editor of He hosts live news and talk (682-4144) Monday through Friday, 2 to 4 p.m., at Barbwire.TV and Reno-Sparks-Washoe Charter cable channels 16 and 216. E-mail barbano@frontpage. Barbwire by Barbano has originated in the Tribune since Aug. 12, 1988.

EDITOR’S NOTE: The Sparks Tribune does not take a position on Barbano’s efforts regarding Charter cable’s attempts to move PEG programming, nor has the paper confirmed Barbano’s use of monetary contributions.
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